BEHIND THE SCENES
I step out of my cocoon
A scalene figure I walk
I sense some side eyes, some smirks.
I fend but two more springs up
like the weeds in the garden
I do what I am best at
and quickly wear my silence
and I smile, smile all day.
I remember the sneering faces
with their coy cheering facade
and eyes so ingenuous
I can read their snarky remarks
bellowing from their minds.
Yet they pretend to be my aide
and furtively regale with stories
of my failures
I know everything
yet I smile, smile all day.
I meet strangers
I skim them and have a hunch.
I slot them in my mind
Some decent, some vile,
some carry metaphors so deep layered.
And, I lost in this labyrinth of characters
find myself befuddled
Their inscrutable nature and
their capricious actions
makes me rearrange the slots.
But I censor my true emotions deftly
and I smile, smile all day.
I retreat to a place
where my heart feels at home,
some ensconced corner
or a blank page maybe
With no peering eyes,
I wallow in self pity
I cry my heart out
bristled with agony
and the stifled words inside me
escape through my cacography.
I walked towards and smile at the mirror
But the eyes give away.
So I become me for the night
stripped of all layers
and with my silence
becoming a roar unfettered
I alleviate my pain
by blurting out, out to the void
with eyes shimmering with fury
and the soul seeking release
from life’s wild cacophony.
Society is pretentious
and I am part of it.
So I play and I know you do too.
And I wake up again the next day
and pick up my smile on the way.
And we all smile, smile everyday.
©Rumi
